Understanding and Helping Students Missing PD
DESCRIPTION OF CASE
Lia (not her real name) is a first-class high school students who had just climbed Favorites Salatiga class II. He came from a farmer who is quite socially and economically in a remote village + 17 km outside the city of Salatiga, as the first child of his parents initially objected After graduating from junior high school children go on to high school in Salatiga; parents had hoped that his son did not have to strain already attend school to the city, but at the invitation of his son’s homeroom when shooting with heavy STTB give up their children attend school.
Consideration of the guardian class for Lia fairly intelligent among other friends who are so normal that can be accepted at the SMU favorites. Since accepted at SMU favorite on the one hand Lia proud as a country boy could always accepted, but on the other hand began to feel inferior to her friends, mostly from wealthy families with social patterns are so different from the background Lia. He considers friends from wealthy families such as selfish, less friendly, picky friend who are both from wealthy families, and arrogant. The longer feeling rejected, terisolik, and loneliness more gripping and nascent attitudes and assumptions school was not for him not krasan, but come out embarrassment with his parents and his compatriots; hold, hard no / have a friend who cares. My basic village children, poor children (compared to his friends in the city) hujatnya yourself. Finally really become a child minder, shy and hesitant and afraid to get along as they should. The longer value fall further so that the burden even heavier thoughts and feelings, as to doubt whether it could go up a class or not
LIA UNDERSTANDING IN PERSPECTIVE rational emotive
In the view of rational emotive, human beings have an inherent ability to act rationally or irrationally, humans are born with a tendency to unusually strong desire and urged that everything happens for the best for her life and completely blame yourself, others, and the world if not immediately get what he wants. Consequently think childish (as things manunusiawi) throughout life, eventually only the extraordinary difficulties are able to achieve and maintain behavior that is realistic and mature; besides humans also have a tendency to overestimate the importance of acceptance of others which actually cause improper emotions often blame themselves in ways that demeanor and self-destructive ways obtained. Think and feel it is very close and with one another: the mind can be feelings and vice versa; What he thinks and what he feels or on something occurrences manifested in actions / behaviors rational or irrational. How actions / behaviors that are very easily influenced by others and the drive-doronan strong to defend themselves and to satisfy themselves even irrational.
The characteristics of irrational people can not be verified, plays the role of God what dimui should occur, to control the world, and if it can not do so is considered stupid and useless; foster a feeling of discomfort (such as anxiety) that actually do not need, not too ugly / embarrassing but is allowed to continue, and prevents a person and headed back to the initial incident and change it. Even eventually lead to a feeling of helplessness in the self-concerned. Forms of thoughts / feelings are irrational, for example: all I have to please my environment, if there are not happy with me it means a disaster for me. That means my fault, because I was worthless, no such person / more friends. I deserve to suffer because of these things.
In connection with the case, Lia actually born with the potential to excel, he became problematic because the behavior is controlled by the thoughts / feelings irrational; he has put pride in the concept / belief is wrong is if the rich, all friends attention / support, care, and others, and it’s all no / captured since high school, until in the end blame himself with blasphemies and suffering and isolates herself. He has managed to build the concept itself is not realistic based on a wrong assumption to (and from) friends environment. He became self-conscious, shy, timid and hesitant ultimately success / achievement later that actually does not need to happen.
PURPOSE AND TECHNICAL COUNSELLING
If the thought Lia illogical / realistic (about the concept of himself and his view of his friends) was fought then he would change it. Thus the goal of counseling is to combat irrational thought Lia underlying the fear / kecematannya that the concept itself is wrong and actions against another friend. In counseling the counselor is more nuanced authoritative: call Lia, invite discussion and confrontation to encourage him to move from the mindset irrational to rational / logical and realistic through persuasive, suggestive, advisory appropriately, therapies by applying the principles of learning for PR and bibliography therapy ,
Cognitive counseling: to show that Lia had to dismantle irrational mindset about the concept of self-esteem is one of, attitudes toward fellow wrong if you want to be happy and successful. Counselors more stylish teaching: giving advice, direct confrontation with maps think rationally-irasoonal, suggestions and asertive training with simulated self-apply the concept of self-correct and attitude / dependence on others right / rational to proceed as a PR exercise, observing and self-evaluation. Example: start of a person’s worth is not of wealth or the number and status supportive friend, but on God’s love and its manifestations. God loves me, because I’m worth dihadiratNya. Against myself someday I am happy, satisfied and proud, but sometimes indifferent-indifferent, even sometimes I hate, cursing myself, so natural and realistic if some 40 friends of the class instance there is + 40% good, 50% neutral, only 10% who hates me. It is impossible demands of all / any person at any time either on me, and so on. These ideas are taught and trained with a scientific approach.
Counseling emotive-evolatif to change the value system Lia using the techniques of awareness between right and wrong as giving examples, role play, and Lia load shedding in order to release the thoughts and feelings that are not rational and replace them with rational as a continuation of cognitive techniques above. Counseling behavioritas used to change negative behavior to amend roots Lia belief is irrational / illogical contract reinforcemen, social modeling and relaxation / meditation.
This theory in helping direct approach using advice characterized by attacking the problem with intellectual and convincing (koselor). The technique is clear, thorough, increasingly see / realize the thoughts and words that are constantly addressed to himself, which brought ruin to themselves. How counselor is with a firm approach, draw attention to the thoughts that the cause of the disorder and how the mind and the sentence was operated until entail no adverse consequences. The counselor helped her to devise further back, challenge, debate, said the sentences were detrimental to it, and in that way he brought the client to awareness and new insights. But the insight and awareness are not enough. He must be trained to think and say to ourselves things that are more positive and realistic. The therapist teaches the client to think right and act effectively. The technique used is eclectic with consideration:
1. Economical in terms of time both for the counselor and counselee
2. Effectiveness of technical-technical used suitable for a wide variety counselee
3. The freshness of the results achieved,
4. Depth and old soil and can be used counselee to counsel himself lost.
In conclusion, the re-structuring of the philosophical to change the wrong personality functioning involves the following steps: (1) fully acknowledge that we are largely responsible for the creation of our own problems; (2) accept the notion that we have the ability to alter significantly disturbances; (3) realize that the problems and emotions derived from irrational beliefs; (4) clearly perceive these beliefs; (5) to accept the fact that, if we hope to change, we better have to deal with ways of behavior and emotions for retaliation to our beliefs and feelings-juice wrong functions and actions that follow; and (6) to practice the methods of RET to eliminate or change kon
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